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Joseph and the Technicolor Eclipse
It takes a page or two, but trust me, this is the most ridiculous rice-up job you'll ever see. Even non-gearheads will appreciate the color... combinations? ...this guy comes up with for his car. Go for the hand file to the head treatment, stay for the spray painted foot pedals.
I think this exchange sums it up...
"You'll never get 900hp with ports like that, they look virtually standard size and they will never flow enough air to support that power."
"I know, but dreaming is free!!"
Yeah, maybe someday someone will take the block apart and see your fancy filework... most likely as they're removing it from your spleen during the post mortem, after your custom engine mysteriously explodes in the middle of the highway.