... is because they're too stupid to do anything else. While this excellent video set seems to cover two separate crimes, the ending seems to imply they were by the same person.

Seems to me it'd be a helluva lot simpler to work a few hours a week at McD's and then just buy the damned booze. Crack's a bitch, ain't it?

Mark gets a ridiculously incompetent no-prize for bringing us examples of "America's Finest Most-Wanted."