April 21, 2005
Posted by scott at April 21, 2005 12:02 PM
Actually, that was a pretty good shot:
A driver is recovering after a frozen sausage was thrown through the window of his moving car, breaking his nose.
The man was driving near his South Woodham Ferrers home in Essex on Monday afternoon when the "bizarre incident" happened, the ambulance service said.
I've owned convertibles for nearly twenty years now, and from experience getting stuff tossed into one is not uncommon. Typically it's the stuff that gets in at low or no speed that's the worst... wasps and spiders are particularly common. However, I've nearly been set on fire twice from flicked cigarette butts, and a bird once kamikazed into the windshield and tumbled through the cabin between Ellen and me before careening into the street.
Worse were the things I've found after leaving the top down overnight. Empty beer bottles and (just once) a condom have "mysteriously" found their way into cars I've owned over the years. Which is why I put the top up if the current spider's going to be sitting outside somewhere overnight. All together now... ewww!
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Several years ago I was sitting at a major intersection in Amarillo TX behind a large pickup truck. This intersection had double turn lanes on both the north and south bound lanes. When making a left turn from this lane your vehicle would pass very closely by any cars that were also making a left turn from the outer turn lane of the south bound side of the street.
While waiting for the light to change I was watching the antics of the three shepard mix puppies that were playing in the bed of the truck in front of me. (Now these weren't newborns they were pretty good sized puppies.) As the turn light came on and the truck started into the intersection one of the puppies jumped up onto the metal toolbox that was mounted behind the trucks rearwindow.
As the truck started his turn the puppy started sliding on the toolbox. I slammed on my brakes, fearing that the puppy would fall out of the truck and into the path of my car. Well it did slide off the toolbox and right over the right side of the truck. This puppy had enough forward momentum as it left the truck that it flew right into the back seat of a convertable that was turning from the southbound side of the street.
The truck driver, apparently seeing his puppy slide past in his rear view mirror, stopped also. As did the car that had been following the convertable through the intersection. We were all stopped in the intersection staring in shock down the east bound street as the car with the puppy in the rear seat drove away.
Suddenly the puppy popped into view from the rear seat of the recceding convertable, leapt forward towards the driver and apparently licked him in the ear. We then got to watch the puppy tumble over the seatback into front seat as the driver of the convertable simultaneously slammed on his brakes, ducked his head, covered his ears with his hands and put his car into an uncontrolled skid across the fortunately open lane to his right.
Once his car stopped skidding, the puppy popped back into view, in the front seat this time. His tongue was out and tail wagging. The puppy spotting his siblings, who were all looking over the side of the truck, jumped awkwardly out of the convertable, and loped up the street and back to his truck.
At this point I drove around the truck to get out of the middle of the intersection. So I don't know what happened to the puppies or the poor convertable driver.
At least none of the stuff tossed in your car has tried to unexpectedly lick you in the ear.
Best. Convertible. Story. Evah.