July 24, 2002

As you all know, I work in a veterinary hospital located inside of a PetsMart. *which my last fucking day there is August 8th*

Now I love PetsMart. I buy too much damn stuff there. *nice employee discount too* They even have lots of interesting critters to purchase. I was already told by the fish guys *who laugh at me when I bring this up* that I am not allowed to bring back the killer Oscar. They say it's a good life experience and that it LOVES me. It wouldn't try to get out of the tank to kiss me everytime I fed it if it didn't. *yeah right, it wants to poke my eyes out with a small stick it found in the tank!*

They also have birds. I love birds. My cats LOVE birds, so I can't have one. Some birds have a tendency to get out of the cages. This is always exciting. Watching everyone go after these little birds with nets.

So today, one of the girls at work *Jamie* says: "there is a finch in pharmacy". Stupid me goes, : "a finch finch? or an outside finch?" "Its a real finch" she says.

Hrmmm!!! got to check this out. Sure enough! Its a finch! A little orange headed one too! So I go and grab a towel and attempt to wrangle the 1 inch beast that will shit on your head at will.

Dr F was in the pharmacy too and suggests *which was a neato idea* to turn the light off and the bird would come down. Why would it do that? I have no damn clue. But it WORKED!

Of course now I have this birdie in my hands. I walk over to a manager in the store and ask them if they lost a finch. "YES!!!, did you find it?" " No..I'm handing you some dog shit.. of course its your finch. It was in pharmacy."

Tossed the bird back in the cage, and that was that. Cute bird though.

Easy cat lunch at my house.

Posted by Ellen at July 24, 2002 04:41 PM

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YOu go girl! Ellen to the rescue - all 5'2" of her. LOL You have to remember she is terrified of one tiny Oscar fish, excuse me one killer tiny Oscar fish.

Posted by: Pat on July 24, 2002 05:02 PM


We have zebra finches. At one point they were so prolific we joked we were going to set a bunch free at the garden center of Home Depot. Then Jaffa learned how to get the cage open.

Posted by: maru on July 25, 2002 10:54 AM

I would have given money to have seen you herding finches. I almost bought one today while at the local PetClub but remembered the fate of my more Cockatiel Zelda. Not a cat lunch but a FERRET! It was like a bad Wild Kingdom my husband said * I was not there, thank GOD*. The little bird with no brains jumped out of her cage and my husband had forgot the ferret was out when he let her out. She was walking around the floor searching for crumbs on the floor and chirping happily when from under the sofa, the little killer weezil came out he said so fast that he had no idea what it was and next a loud squawk and boom *** NO MORE ZELDA!*** Then the ferret tried to run off with her and pulled her under the sofa to add to her trophy collection inside the sofa ( which we found out later consisted of the missing remote with no more buttons, a rubber flip flop and all the rubber cat balls. My Damn ferret has a fetish). The other bird saw the whole thing and died 2 weeks later from morning himself to death. And I don't know now who I felt sorry for, Zelda or my poor EX husband who had to call me at work and tell me that he let my hand fed baby that I had had for 6 years was dead because he let the bandit loose!

Glad the finch turned out ok. Just thought I would share my story with you too.


Posted by: Lisa on July 25, 2002 11:41 AM

In a past life, back when Ellen was in grade school, I had 2 ferrets that we pretty much let roam the house. Stank up the place, left horrible little messes in all the corners, and generally freaked out whoever wanted to stay there.

This kept on until one of our two cats had kittens. One of the little monsters tried to make off with a baby, at which point:

  • My roommate, who fortunately happened to be right there, heard the scream
  • My rommate grabbed the ferret's head
  • Mommycat grabbed my rommate's ankle
  • Daddycat grabbed the dog's nose
  • Dog started yelping and ran down the stairs, daddycat hot on his heels
  • My roommate got the kitten away from the ferret (kitten was fine) and then pried mommycat from ankle

All I heard was this huge howling ruckus and my poor beagle shreiking down the stairs with 10 lbs of sharp-clawed death right behind him. I had to sit on daddycat to get him to calm down, by which time it was all over.

The ferrets went into a cage that night and were never allowed out unsupervised again.

Ours had a hidey-hole inside a couch arm too. When my roommate moved out we found nearly all of the socks that'd gone missing over the three years we'd lived there.

But ya know what, sometimes I miss the little buggers. Not enough to get more, but they did have their moments, like when I taught the smart one to sit up for cocoa-puffs.

Posted by: scott on July 25, 2002 12:17 PM

They were nasty little beasties. I was afraid to go to sleep. They could slide underneath the bedroom door even after I had stuffed towels around the door. Also I seems to remember one found a hole in the closet and suddenly a head popped up from under the bed just when I thought I was safe.

Posted by: Pat on July 25, 2002 05:29 PM
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