June 19, 2002
Cat Yak

"ELLLLLEEEEN!!!!!, the cat yaked on the floor again! Fucking cat!" *Tries to hold back laughter cause I KNOW he has stepped in it* "Which one threw up?" "YUUUKK!! I don't know! You have so many! Clean it up! This is so gross!"

They do it on purpose ya know. They are setting traps. Wet slimy traps. OR, even better a nice fresh one that is still warm when you step in it.

Cats yaking does not bother me. I find it rather funny when they do it. Now, don't get me wrong, I KNOW shit can be wrong with a cat when it decides to yak its brains out and get ill. But my cats do what is called 'recreational vomiting'.

What the hell is that? Recreational vomting? Well, they do it just because. Especially after eating a rather large meal *cause cats hardly chew food.-SEE! SEE! PETA piss ants! cats are true carnivores, the don't have the teeth to really chew food, so fuck off with your veggies!* After that large meal, you get the look. *they have to prepare ya know* Followed by this noise, which can only be as described as "bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh...YAAAAAAKKKK!!!!"

At this point, if you are sleeping, you pretend you didn't hear it. But you have to deal with it when you get up. But hey, if you get an extra 30 minutes sleep by ignoring the yak, its all cool. Until Scott steps in it. If you are not sleeping, usually the other cats will either 1. admire how the other cat managed to throw up all of its food from its acending colon up, or 2. think, *hey, you are wasting food!! hrrm....its already been chewed too. I'll eat it!*~munch munch munch.~

It amazes me the several types of cat yak there is. Food, which is the most common in our house, that resembles a snake when tossed back up. Food and hair-which is just a hair snake that has been yaked up. Or you get what looks like a small animall that has decided to be regurgitated by the cat. A wet, messy one. If you follow Goblin around the house, you may be in for an extra special treat. Cat yak with toilet paper in it.

The cat has a toilet paper fetish. Not a fetish for dirty paper, you sick fuck. She likes brand new rolls. The more expensive and kinder to your ass paper the better. She murders them and then leaves the poor roll torn apart all over the hallway closet. She claims its not her, but usually the bit of paper hanging from the mouth is a dead giveaway.

Her yak is extra special. At $4.00 for 4 double rolls, it better be.

I should mention that Scott will not clean up cat yak, ever. He pretends he doesn't see it, and then go "Ellen! Do you see what your cat did!?" *Looks over at the cat yak on the window sill* "Yeah." "Well aren't you going to clean it up?" *laughs* "No, leave it. Goblin will come over and eat it for you." Then he does the foot stomp, body jerk and a big "YUUUUK!"

Posted by Ellen at June 19, 2002 06:06 PM

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Orange streaks orange streaks everywhereIlook

So don't any of you make fun of me if you visit and I have astroturf for carpet. It's the only thing they can't stain.

Posted by: scott on June 19, 2002 07:00 PM

LOLOL! It's so true!

Where as I get to scrape up the cat yak after Brian steps in it in the middle of the night, he has to do the same thing with the dogs' messes, which are truly gross!


Posted by: maru on June 20, 2002 08:56 AM

The worst by far was when I had 2 ferrets. They were cute buggers, but proved impossible to housebreak. An unhousebroken ferret is a poop machine. Let's just say it made walking around the house pretty interesting in the morning.

Posted by: scott on June 20, 2002 02:39 PM

You know what's funny? I found this page by doing a Google search for, "Recreational Vomiting." This page was the #1 result.

Posted by: Daniel K on April 14, 2005 08:46 PM
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