May 10, 2007
Reason to Never, Ever, Ever Visit a Rainforest # 235

Remember those stories about a fish that'd swim up your wee stream and lodge itself in your willie? All true man, all true. Unlike other stories I've read, this one has pictures of the lovely little critter. Language is a little blue, but otherwise the article is SFW.

Posted by scott at May 10, 2007 01:31 PM

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Lessons:

1. Don't skinny dip anywhere in the Amazon Basin (see also Pirahna).

2. Tight-fitting suits like Speedos are a must to keep junk out of your junk (and you men out there, you STILL have to wear boxer-type suits OVER the Speedo. I don't care how 'European' you think you are--no one...repeat--NO ONE...wants to see your junk).

3. Or better still, just stay the hell out of the water

Posted by: Mark on May 10, 2007 04:45 PM

It's possible that most of Scott and Ellen's neighborhood have seen my junk, so why would it matter now?

Posted by: ronaprhys on May 10, 2007 10:04 PM

that's just disturbing Ron...no wonder none of their neighbors ever comes outside when we're out there!

Posted by: Mark on May 13, 2007 10:37 AM

Just because they've seen it doesn't mean they enjoy looking at it.

Anyhow, you don't have to swim in the Amazon to get screwed up by parasites, though it makes it much more likely. Botflies will be only too happy to lay eggs in any exposed patch of skin or hair, preferably in your scalp, where they can't be easily interrupted. There are parasites in the Amazon that don't even have names, let alone medicines to repel them. It's like one giant festering mass of self-consuming biology, and it will gladly consume you, too, if you give it a chance.

Posted by: Tatterdemalian on May 13, 2007 04:23 PM
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