This has to be a record of some sort:

A man caught driving naked from the waist down while watching kiddie porn on his laptop computer has become the first man in Toronto charged with allegedly stealing an Internet connection.

Looks like "stealing an internet connection" was just what the cops charged him with to hang on to him until the detectives could show up. Paperwork for that sort of arrest must be easier in Toronto or something. Sick, stupid, and dangerous. Boy, now that's a trifecta.