March 16, 2003
25 Weeks

Ok, I'm done being pregnant. This is not happening fast enough. Yeah ok, I know, I should be enjoying this, but I'm getting annoyed with my body.

Bending over (or rather bending at the knees and squatting) to pick something up is rather uncomfortable. Rather uncomfortable like trying to cram a bowling ball up ... well, you know ... is uncomfortable. This basketball that I apparently swallowed has gotten in the way to the point that I can't even put panty hose on correctly. Or socks. Or shoes. Or pants. And it's only going to get worse.

Now I get looks from Scott like: "Dear god, could you get any bigger?!? No no... please, don't stand up... no really, I was just leaving, no no... please..." [bZZZZAp!!]. I look at myself in the mirror getting dressed, "Yeah, I am, aren't I? It's quite a bit larger today. DAYMN!" Then trying to get the clothes on that fit you last week this week is a new chore.

I'm also finding out that talking on 'pregnancy chat' rooms is NOT a good idea. To sit back and watch is fun, but to participate is like feeding yourself to the wolves.


Mom0f50ScreamingAngels: My labor was so easy that I did not even know I was in labor. I was cooking dinner and it slid right out on the floor. You know what I did? I just put it in the sink for a moment and finished carving the roast, served it (the roast, but I did have to look) and then tended to my new darling.

TwinboysandaTwoYearOld: Oh yeah? My labor was so intense... my left leg fell off! I sewed it back on without anesthesia while I was breastfeeding.

There's always an "oooo" or "poor dear" comments being made for stuff like that.

I just sit back and wonder what the hell is wrong with these people. If they are like that online, who knows what they are like in real life! Are these the same women who put their 3 week old embryo into the ultra-expensive schools?!? Are these the same women who compare how 'advanced' their kids are compared to other children?!? Could this be me?!?

Nah. I gave a "onesie" to my goth friends so they could make a going home outfit out of spikes, leather, and PVC pipe. I fully plan to be the soccer mom from hell. Watch the f*ck out, little miss Susie Minivan!

Posted by Ellen at March 16, 2003 09:19 PM

eMail this entry!

Well, we'll prolly avoid the spikes. If you need to pick her up and hug her, we don't wanna be responsible for spikes in the neck, that could get ugly and painful!! Wonder if we can hunt down rubber spikes, I think they exist, hhmmm.

Ellen's tummy is getting nice and round, but she looks so damn cute!! I'm just afraid that when it's about 8 months into the deal, Ellen'll topple over.

I'm just happy cuz I got to feel Olivia kick, hehe. Fun for me, not so comfy for Ellen.

Posted by: Battie on March 16, 2003 10:28 PM

Jeez...maybe you should consider doing it the "Hollywood" know,deliver the baby Cesarean(sp) at about 7 months and then lie and say that the baby was premature...sure the poor kid may have some health risks, but hey...less stretch marks for you and you can go back to drinking and partying with in-crowd two months early!

It's FAB!

Posted by: Not Father Of The Year on March 16, 2003 11:08 PM

I don't think you want me to respond to this little essay.
Yeah, I've been through it. And like you I wanted to be there. I didn't have too many problems, but then I didn't have the six pack abs previously and I'm 5'8" with nice big bones.
Geez E, your pregnant and CAN NOT DO EVERYTHING you used to do with the SAME amount of EASE!
Sorry, that just slipped in there.
You will also notice, that I DO NOT drive a minivan. As J about that. No one old enough can make me drive one of those.

Posted by: Cindy on March 17, 2003 12:17 AM

Battie I just bought a tiny pearl braclet for Olivia. Do you suppose it would look ok with rubber spikes and leather? lol

Lighten up Miss C.

Posted by: Pat on March 17, 2003 03:15 AM

I bought a bracelet. Maybe I should buy spelling lessons for Grandma. lol I also bought a necklace, Miss Olivia's first jewelry.

Posted by: Pat on March 17, 2003 03:17 AM

Why not!! Mixing and matching can be good.

Wow, that "Hollywood" style sounds...uuhh, great?? And I guess the nanny or someone else takes care of the baby while the parents are off partying and drugging themselves up!! Woo hoo, now THAT'S the life!!

Posted by: Battie on March 17, 2003 09:19 AM

First off, I am writing my weeks up as something to remind me of what is going on why 'my' body. No one elses. I'm not chosing any set person to look at and compare myself too. Everyone's pregnancy is very different. Plus I'm more or less picking on the 'Hollywood' idea of a woman in pregnancy, with the perfect family ect.. BUT those women online, ARE THAT NUTS.

I am obviously not looking at the pregnancy and childbirth thing the way people think I should. Oh well. I'm not that kind of person. Will I turn into one? I have no idea.

I understand I cannot do everything that I used to do, and or want to do. But I can complain about it. When I can do it again, I can look back and see something I took so easy in the past for granted, and while I was pregnant it seemed impossible.

Posted by: Ellen on March 17, 2003 05:44 PM

You just sounded very down about it.

Posted by: Cindy on March 17, 2003 11:54 PM
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